Facetime, and Some Thoughts on Medieval Times' Royal Court

Well, Mortals, on Thursday, your humble Dragonmaster returns to Columbia-Presbyterian Hospital's Harkness Eye Institute. I have some extremely unfinished business thither, and I mean to finish it. Alas, I took the liberty this morning of researching WebMD.com; and, based on my findings, it appears that I shall be diagnosed with what they call a chalazion, which may or may not be connected with blepharitis, which is a common problem which causes inflammation of the eyelids. At the very least, which is what I believe will happen in my case, the idea is that they're first going to place me in a medically-induced coma, so that I won't go about screaming "Aaaaaah!!!" and whatnot. There is, I fear, a potential risk of brain damage, which means a good many more of my questions must still be answered; nevertheless, the idea is that they're going to stab the chalazion so that it can then be drained.

Following this, once they've properly brought me out of the coma (again, the potential for possible brain damage may result), the apothecaries --- doctors, in Mortal-tongue --- will very likely prescribe eyedrops and/or eye ointment (be aware, dearests, that I'm betting on the latter). Frankly, I, for one, would prefer to face the lasers of ye Byg Appyl's definitive ocular apothecaries, the Brothers Dello Russo! Besides, 'tis Imus in the Morning who usually talks about them ad nauseum; and, one presumes, they're friends of his, so methinks ye can guess the rest for thyselves!

But for now, and assuming I don't emerge from this unscathed, and believe me, I need to emerge from this unscathed in the worst way, by Merlin's beard, let us speak of some merrier things --- and even merrier Royal People. Like these guys!



Meet His Majesty, King Phillipe, and Their Royal Highnesses, Prince Tristan and Princess Leonore: the Royals of Medival Times Dinner & Tournament! They enjoy life as a typical happy Royal Family, but there's this sort of power struggle going on in the background where Tristan's pretty much the invisible Prince; and unbeknownst to Phillipe and Leonore, one of the six Knights taking part in the Tournament is the main villain of the piece. Boo! Hiss!

Well, whilst we mere Mortals are cheering our favorite Knights, no one is getting the hint that a hostile takeover bid for the Kingdom is in progress. So, at the last minute, Tristan has to free himself, kick ye olde obligatory Knightly butte, and do the dirty work of setting things right himself. Somewhere in the midst of all this, meanwhile, one of Medieval Times' most beloved traditions persists: the choosing by one of the Knights of a fair maiden from the stands to reign as Queen of Love and Beauty (Waitaminnit! They usually crown a lovely lady with that particular moniker on St. Patrick's Day in Rolla, Missouri, if memory serves me correctly!).

Anyway, once peace and harmony are properly restored to the Kingdom, it's time to get on with the real business of the show: meeting the Royals upclose! Only at Medieval Times will you goodly gentles be able to do anything like that! Do ye doubt me? Behold, then!

Well, kids, if I return out of this a properly ointment'd Dragonmaster, look for me to do the Halloween Parade in about a week or so; I'll be the one with the new trusty staff King Tiberias of Jerusalem crafted for me. I hope ol' Moonstar, the Werewolf of Brooklyn shows up too, else I'll hafta spend the night interacting with my fellow Wizards, or several members of the undead, and/or one or two drag queens, depending on my personal preferences! See ya (I hope!).

Master Blackwolf