Blackwolf the Dragonmaster's Diary of Magecraft

Being a Chronicle of the Inner Secrets of, and Spells of Magick as Wielded by, the Philosopher of the Internet and Unofficial Sorcerer-in-Residence of the City of New York

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Location: New York, New York, United States

As New York's Unofficial Wizard, my mission is to encourage the Mortals of Manhattan to imagine responsibly!

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Blackwolf Interviews Santa, Part 3

Well, there are occasions when even Santa finds time to unwind. As I understand it, you have a way to do this --- and it's called the Music Room. Would you tell our visitors about it?

Ah, yes, my Music Room! It's a very intimate part of my North Pole home, mostly because it's a shrine that houses every known musical instrument on Earth! As you can obviously figure out, I've learned to play them all; you pick up a lot of skills when you fly around the world in a single night, you know.

Interesting! Have you a favorite instrument to play?

Well, I will admit to blasting a tune or two on the Great Scottish Highland Bagpipes; the Elves get a great laugh when I show myself in a tartan kilt and sporran. Indeed, I've been known to check out the Edinburgh Military Tattoo whenever I can; that Tom Fleming fellow can sure tell a good story or two without saying too much! But, usually, when I'm in a more peaceful mood, I settle for playing the violin. Playing the fiddle at intervals allows me to relax, enjoy the silence of the moment, and, more importantly, gives me an opportunity to focus and concentrate on things.

Well, Santa, as you know, I'm more of a lute-playing sort of Wizard meself.

To each his own, Master Blackwolf. You know that as well as I do.

Ah, yes indeed! Well, everyone has one or two funny memories and/or embarrassing moments --- even Santa Claus.

I fear you are quite right about that, Master Blackwolf. To illustrate your point, let me tell you one such hilarious anecdote. I remember well when the reindeer and I were soaring over Denver. The good folks at NORAD were tracking my movements as usual, no one was interfering with our control of Colorado airspace --- but suddenly, there was something I had not seen in many aeons: a UFO!

A UFO? My goodness! Certainly extraterrestrials were pursuing you, as they did of yore when the Martians tried to kidnap you. How in thunder did you deal with them?

Well, I simply said hello! Using one of the backup systems I keep in the sleigh as a precaution, I beamed the gift I left with those aliens into their vessel. They quickly vanished afterward, and I was able to continue. Now, here's where the embarrassing part comes in: On Christmas morning, I found out that a few of my Elves --- who had obviously seen The X-Files --- had put together the ol' 'Let's give Santa a Star Trek laugh' routine. Well, we did have a great giggle about it afterwards, but then, I made the offending Elves promise me that they would visit

Tell me about that one.

Well, the creators of New Voyages have their own mission: to recreate a "fourth season" of Star Trek on NBC -- fictitiously, of course.

And you got that because of all your work with NORAD? By Merlin's beard, I'm impressed!

Well, that's what makes me such an icon, Master Blackwolf --- because there are still so many of those Mortals who do believe in me. And of course, I remain grateful to each and every one.

Thank goodness! Nonetheless, there are a few grumpy folks who keep on wondering if you can still be relevant in a post-9/11 Multiverse. What have you to say to people who express those opinions?

Well, I think I've spent centuries believing in the goodness of Mankind, and yet it's never been as easy locating those who believe in me in return. So far, I've had everything happen to me: I've been punched, kicked, stepped on, yelled at --- in fact, I recall that poor angry fellow in California who removed his Santa costume with a whole bunch of fans watching --- that had to be quite an embarrassing situation for the Cherry Hill Photo people!

Yes, I believe I did hear about that one!

Well, let's just hope the Cherry Hillers learned their lesson!


Speaking of lessons: I've been watching your present Quest, Master Blackwolf --- the one where you remind your fans to "Imagine responsibly."

Oh you have, eh? What do you think of it?

I think you have amazing and energetic prospects. You're probably one of the few Wizards I've encountered -- other than Merlin, of course --- who dares to come out and tell the world the world exactly what his intentions are. In my book, Master Blackwolf, that makes you a VERY good boy indeed!

Thank you, Santa. Needless to say, I will do my darndest to remain a very good boy; besides, I have a movie to work on for all of next year, as you know.

You mean, after all this time, you're still planning Blackwolf the Dragonmaster's First Movie?

A motion picture must first be thought out and then planned before one can commit to the writing of the script. Didn't Jeannot Szwarc teach you that?

Oh yes, you're right. He most certainly did.

Well, now, as Christmas Eve approaches, I though we would close our conversation by looking to the future.

Ah, the future of Santa Claus. A topic not easily explored or even undersrtood, yet a topic far too many historians tend to tackle the wrong way.

The WRONG way? What do you mean?

Well, here's how I see my future: There will always be believers, regardless of race, creed, color, nation of origin, size, shape, form, etc. The point, Master Blackwolf, is a really simple one: Christmas means something far larger and much more significant than the day Santa delivers his presents. Its primary reason for being stems from one unshakable truth: that its purpose is to remind the human race of just how much unconditional positive regard it is truly capable of. Now lately, I haven't seen much of that unconditional positive regard happening worldwide; and yet I continue to persist because there are those who consider me their last best hope.

And of course, Santa, I trust that I am included in that particular fraternity.

Indeed you are, my dear Wizard.

Well, having taken on all that, Santa Claus, let me thank you for letting me interview you, first of all; and, if you would, please share a few closing thoughts with my friends and fans across the Multiverse.

I would be most honored, Master Blackwolf. Well, my friends, now you know. And as always, I thank all of you throughout the world for having never lost your faith in me all these centuries. There are one or two brickbats along the way, of course, but those will always be minor as the aeons go on. My hope, as ever, is that goodness, kindness and wisdom will always prevail, no matter what. And with YOUR help, dear friends, I shall find newer and even more magical ways to make all that happen! Until then --- and please join me, if you would, Master Blackwolf:

(Both together:) "MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL, A GOOD NIGHT!" Ho-ho-ho!!!

And with that, we conclude my conversation with Santa Claus. I certainly hope you all enjoyed it. I did, of course, have lots and lots more questions, but it is not my place to keep Santa from the swift completion of his appointed rounds. Besides, the High Istari wouldn't allow me to do anything that silly! Still, we have much to dream about here on these Nights Before Christmas --- and believe me, the ol' Dark Chambers will follow Santa as diligently as Master Richard's own pages do! Huzzah! and hurrah!

Fearlessly yours, as always,

Master Blackwolf