Blackwolf the Dragonmaster's Diary of Magecraft

Being a Chronicle of the Inner Secrets of, and Spells of Magick as Wielded by, the Philosopher of the Internet and Unofficial Sorcerer-in-Residence of the City of New York

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Location: New York, New York, United States

As New York's Unofficial Wizard, my mission is to encourage the Mortals of Manhattan to imagine responsibly!

Monday, July 28, 2008

Monday Grumbles and Several Things to Know Prior to Sterling Forest

Greetings, readers of the ol' Diary of Magecraft!

At the risk of biting the proverbial hand that feeds me, let it be known that one is aware that the Primetime Emmy Awards have completely anything resembling credibility when one discovers that this year's show, set for September 21st, airing live on ABC from the Nokia Theatre in Hollywood, will have not just one, but five hosts --- and that, in a further ironic bit of insanity, all five are also nominated in the newly-created category Outstanding Reality Show Host!

Those five are: Tom Bergeron, Dancing w/the Stars; your Dragonmaster's forever icky-poo enemy Ryan Seacrest, for that eternally odious American Idol; ol' chrome-dome, Howie Mandel, Deal or No Deal; Heidi Klum, Project: Runway; and the grand old sage of reality television himself, Jeff Probst, Survivor.

The maniac they have chosen to executive produce this outrage is none other than Ken Ehrlich. From his lofty throne on Oak View Drive in downtown Encino, California, evil Ken persists in his Quest to rule the TV world --- and destroy anyone that dares get in his way! I, having long ago grumbled about what awards shows can do to a Wizard's psyche, choose to wash my hands of the whole sorry business. Besides, there are other matters to deal with that have, this past weekend, caused your Dragonmaster to undergo agita.

It seems that one of my fellow Champions of the Imagination, the Naked Cowboy, apparently cannot catch ye proverbial break! It's bad enough that he's still at war with the imbeciles from M&M's Chocolate Candies --- but now, our favorite Stetson-clad butt-wiggler par excellence has apparently been busted --- by the San Francisco Police Department! Apparently, Frisco's Finest failed to figure out that they were dealing with Times Square's legendary crooner in ye buffe! They nailed him at Union Square for, as they put it, performing in a restricted area --- and worse, they mocked him once they'd gotten him back to the station!

"It was nonstop. They're laughing hysterically because there's this guy in his underwear. Then they're like, 'Oh, that's the Naked Cowboy,' " our Robert John Burck tells the New York Post.

Y'know, kids, this is why there are days when I'm happy that we're just days removed from the New York Renaissance Faire's Opening Weekend @ Sterling Forest. Now, as usual, I know not what I'm gonna be stepping into once we get things started at ten of the clock this forthcoming Saturday, but I can say this: There's always some reason for Robin Hood and the Sheriff of Nottingham to battle each other each year --- figuring out what the lads' problem this year's gonna be is always a challenge for this foolish old Mage. As ever, I pray I'm up to it.

Master Blackwolf