Blackwolf the Dragonmaster's Diary of Magecraft

Being a Chronicle of the Inner Secrets of, and Spells of Magick as Wielded by, the Philosopher of the Internet and Unofficial Sorcerer-in-Residence of the City of New York

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Location: New York, New York, United States

As New York's Unofficial Wizard, my mission is to encourage the Mortals of Manhattan to imagine responsibly!

Monday, June 05, 2006

Today's Guest Blogger (albeit a little bit early): The Devil!

Greetings, you oh so icky-poo Mortals!

Lucifer, Prince of Darkness here --- otherwise known as the Devil! Look, I know that 06/06/06 is about 24 hours away, but frankly, I couldn't wait anymore. So here I am, taking over Blackwolf's Diary of Magecraft for two basic reasons: first, to gloat about how I'm going to take over the world --- again --- and secondly, to laugh my nasty laugh!

Before I do either of those things, there are a few things concerning 06/06/06 that I'd like to get off my oh so evil chest, and here they are:

First, as you may or may not have heard, those five freakily Finnish fiends, Lordi, will, on 06/06/06, unleash their Eurovision-winning single Hard Rock Hallelujah upon the world. It becomes more and more apparent to me that Lordi and his minions get it about the forces of Nastiness. My dear and beloved Villainess, Rita Repulsa, once said it better than I ever could: "It's very, very good to be very, very bad!" And obviously, Lordi was so remarkably bad that now, their native land of Finland will now host next year's 52nd Annual
Eurovision Song Contest! How's that for unleashing evil across the Multiverse, eh, party people? And I hope that there'll be others who will dare to do what Lordi and his cronies did in May --- that is, they dragged the forces of pop music kicking and screaming into the dung heap of groovedom where it belongs! Ha-ha!

There's also the fact that the Miami Heat are in the NBA Finals for the first time in franchise history. Unfortunately, so are the Dallas Mavericks! And even worse, a charter member of those wretched Good Guys is playing for the aforementioned Heat (I refer, of course, to Shaq). Well, whilst I resent that Shaq is playing in the NBA Finals, let me absolve him of something: at least, once the season is over, I may just make him get back to making rotten movies! Kazaam 2, anyone?

Speaking of rotten movies: I personally resent the fact that The Omen has been remade! Needless to say, those Fox fools did this for one reason and one reason alone: Dinero. Cash. Moolah. Big bucks. Ah, you know what I'm talking about, Mortals! Need I really paint you a picture of it? As far as I'm concerned, I'll take the original three Omen movies any day of the week! And as for that thrice-damned Da Vinci Code: I'd like to kick ol' Leo, that noodle-headed Nostradamus and all their far-seeing friends where the sun don't shine!

Well, enough about that. Time now to do that gloating thing I promised: The planet Earth and her people are so bonkers now, that they need help --- and I'm the beastie to give 'em that help! Y'see, this is what I love about being a Villain: I get to sit on my Throne of Doom and challenge the Good Guys any way that I can! Besides, it's getting to be a banner season lately for us Villains; even those alleged do-gooders over at Yahoo! have come to
realize that there's a place in their pages just for us Villains! So, on behalf of all the Villains of Earth, I, the Devil, herewith demand the respect of all you Mortals out there .... because if you don't, I'll have to get tough and start poking people with me trusty trident. And now that that little bit of Devilish business is out of the way, 'tis time, as threatened, for me to laugh my nasty laugh!


(Me, that felt so bad!)

See you downstairs, Mortals! Muhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sincerely yours,