Blackwolf the Dragonmaster's Diary of Magecraft

Being a Chronicle of the Inner Secrets of, and Spells of Magick as Wielded by, the Philosopher of the Internet and Unofficial Sorcerer-in-Residence of the City of New York

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Location: New York, New York, United States

As New York's Unofficial Wizard, my mission is to encourage the Mortals of Manhattan to imagine responsibly!

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Nutty Dragonmaster Remarks

So a Dragonmaster walks into a phone booth ... and kvetches about having to turn into Superman, again! By Merlin's beard, there's just so much a Wizard of my stature can accomplish! Even now, I'm worrying about my ancient, metal bookshelf collapsing, and doing possible damage to me Wizard's Tower (my new name for the humble hovel, as I shall be phasing out the latter phrase in the coming months)! Those HUD sillies are very likely going to physically inspect the ol' apartment --- and possibly traumatize my Mortal-born alter ego in the process!

Then again, 2007 to this point has been a wild and crazy year for Blackwolf the Dragonmaster anyway! I've literally risked frostbite to give joy to a happy bride and groom; I've had to go and locate a proper apothecary to x-ray me thumb after unexpectedly stumbling onto me thumb bone and all (fortunately, the injury turned out not to be all that serious); I've posted another graphically-detailed Oscar Nominations List, along with an accompanying five-part epic wrap-up chronicle; and, of course, I've been kvetching about me Official Rock Band, Lordi --- who at this very moment are wrapping up their first-ever horror movie, Dark Floors, scheduled to premiere in Helsinki on February 8th! As you know, I've already warned Mr. Lordi to steer clear of those odious Weinsteins; I shall be displeased if that fat ape Harvey gets his greedy paws on Dark Floors!

And then, there was probably THE most desperate moment in my entire post-Triumph phase to date: my declaration that Ryan Seacrest must run for President, if only to get everybody to shut up about all this nonsense and bad behavior going on from Washington, D.C. to Hollywood, California! And now, after the recent insanity that was the 2007 MTV Video Music Awards --- with Britney's opening number a virtual flameout, Kid Rock and Tommy Lee coming to literal blows for the heart of bimbo extremus Pamela Anderson, and Kanye West deciding he and 50 Cent must join their forces to avenge themselves upon MTV in general ----

Well, Mortals, let it be heard; ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! There's a time when the world will simply push this old Wizard way beyond too far! Indeed, I've a good mind to take me trusty Wizard's staff, raise it over me head and call upon Merlin's power to force an afternoon rainstorm upon mine adopted metropolis, to teach you goodly gentles a lesson in sense and manners! In fact, I think I'll go do it now -- but first, one more interview to do, and it's tonight with the wild maniacs of the online radio show, Oh yeah, and I promised Master Thoth I'd try to check on his links, too! Oh twaddle! Looks like I'll have to step into the damn phone booth again! Oh, just cue up the bloody Superman Theme Music and be done with it!

Master Blackwolf