Blackwolf the Dragonmaster's Diary of Magecraft

Being a Chronicle of the Inner Secrets of, and Spells of Magick as Wielded by, the Philosopher of the Internet and Unofficial Sorcerer-in-Residence of the City of New York

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Location: New York, New York, United States

As New York's Unofficial Wizard, my mission is to encourage the Mortals of Manhattan to imagine responsibly!

Sunday, April 04, 2010

Wabbit Want!

Happy Easter, Mortals! Well, as you know, my adventure this morning at the Easter Parade on Fifth Avenue, marking as it did my first official public appearance of the New Year, went off without a hitch --- somewhat. I was all set to feel me oats .... but then the world, as is often its wont, crashed down 'pon your humble Dragonmaster. Richard Concepcion, creator-producer of local public-access icon Rapid T. Rabbit and Friends, sent me an e-mail on Friday, which I had the good sense to delete immediately afterward, telling me not to 'follow' him around during the Promenade. "You are NOT helping me when you do," those were the twit's exact words.

Concepcion, boobeleh, methinks an understanding is very much in order at this juncture. Know ye, then, the following:

NUMBER ONE: Were you discovered by Robert Smigel in May 2002? I don't think so!

NUMBER TWO: Did Triumph the Insult Comic Dog invite you onto the red carpet at the 2002 MTV Video Music Awards? I don't think so!

NUMBER THREE: Did you manage to stumble onto Triumph's Grammy Award-losing Come Poop w/Me album? I don't think so!

NUMBER FOUR: Did you eventually find yourself, once more through the good assistance of the fresh hound, matching wits with those five freaky Finns, Lordi? Again, I don't think so!

And on top of all of the above, my Mortal-born alter ego will soon become the latest landlubber to join the ranks of "Cap'n Slappy's Profiles in Pirattitude," as featured in Pirates Magazine! With the exception of Carolyn Crimi's Buccaneer Bunnies, I don't see any rabbit puppets boasting about that!

And what, may I ask, were you doing whilst Master Richard was accomplishing these tremendous things? You were sittin' on your fat rump in some third-rate 14th Street studio in the Flatiron District of Midtown Manhattan, churnin' out a third-rate kids' puppet show watched by absolutely nobody. You heard me: No. Bah. Dee.

My fans always cheer me on whenever I come straight to the point, so let's just call it what it is and simply say that this is all about your damn ego. Oh yeah, you can make the attempt to do that with others all you want, but try it against the likes of Blackwolf the Dragonmaster and I will make damn sure that you become my enemy. I shan't say anything to do you emotional and/or psychological damage; I shall simply stare at you harshly and move on. I lose enough sleep as it is trying to keep a grip on maintaining responsibility for both my website and this blog. I don't have time to kvetch about some third-rate kid-show puppeteer's ego.

And now that I've properly made myself clear, I'm off to resume my normal Dragonmasterly patterns. You who are fans of Rapid T. Rabbit and Friends, just so you know, I ain't answerin' any of your hate e-mail. I have better things to do with my time than listen to you take me to school about him. Now have a nice day.