Blackwolf the Dragonmaster's Diary of Magecraft

Being a Chronicle of the Inner Secrets of, and Spells of Magick as Wielded by, the Philosopher of the Internet and Unofficial Sorcerer-in-Residence of the City of New York

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Location: New York, New York, United States

As New York's Unofficial Wizard, my mission is to encourage the Mortals of Manhattan to imagine responsibly!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

The Diary of Magecraft, Post #299: "Oscar, Oscar Night"

By Merlin's beard! I am now officially one post away from hitting Missive #300 here in the ol' Diary of Magecraft! And what better way to celebrate than to share with ye goodly gentles my legendary take-off on "Thriller!" (Yes, we know about the 25th Anniversary thing, but for obvious reasons, I have chosen not to link to, as it is no more than mere eye candy designed to revive a failed musical Legend destroyed!) Pray, my dears, enjoy "Oscar, Oscar Night:"

It's close to nine (live).
There's something boring lurking in the dark.
Under the moonlight,
You see a sight that almost stops your heart.
You try to cheer,
But boredom takes the sound before you make it.
You start to freeze
As Johnny looks you right between the eyes.
You're paralyzed!

You hear the door slam and realize there's nowhere left to run! (C'mon, c'mon!)
You feel the gold hand and wonder if you'll ever see the sun! (C'mon!)
You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination,
But all the while, you see the stars are movin' up behind,
And you're out of time!

They're out to get you,
Celebrities closin' in on ev'ry side....
They will possess you
Unless you change that number on your dial!
Now is the time for you and I to go and catch the late show.
All through the night, I'll save you from the terrors on the screen;
I'll make you see.........

Darkness falls across the land.
The hour of nine is close at hand
Creatures crawl in search of gold
To terrorize y'awl's neighbourhood.
And whosoever shall be found
Without the soul to come on down
Must stand and face the movie screen,
And rot despite eternal screams!

The foulest stench is in the air,
The junk of 80 boring years ---
And grisly ghouls from ev'ry film
Are closing in to seal your doom!
And though you fight to stay awake,
Your body starts to shiver,
For no mere Mortal can resist
The climax of --- the Oscar!

Cuz this is Oscar, Oscar Night,
And no one's gonna save you from the beasts about to strike.
You know it's Oscar, Oscar Night ---
You're fighting for your life inside the ---
Emmy ---

Oscar, Oscar Night:
Cuz I got more awards than any film would ever dare vie
Oscar, Oscar Night!
So let me hold you tight and share the ---
Here toniiiiiiiiiiiiiight!!!

Cuz this is Oscar, Oscar Night,
And I got more awards than any film would ever dare vie
Oscar (whoo hoo!), Oscar Night!
So let me hold you tight and share the ---

And from there, of course, we segue into ye olde Thriller Dance! Pray, goodly gentles, let us boogie!

Master Blackwolf