Blackwolf the Dragonmaster's Diary of Magecraft

Being a Chronicle of the Inner Secrets of, and Spells of Magick as Wielded by, the Philosopher of the Internet and Unofficial Sorcerer-in-Residence of the City of New York

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Location: New York, New York, United States

As New York's Unofficial Wizard, my mission is to encourage the Mortals of Manhattan to imagine responsibly!

Sunday, October 19, 2008

King Neptune's ALCS Rant!

Greetings, Surface-dwellers! Neptunus Rex, King of all the Oceans here --- and I am clearly NOT a happy camper this day. Damn you, Boston Red Sox! Why won't you stay defeated?!?

As I feared, there is indeed to be a seventh and deciding game in this vile American League Championship Series --- and I fear that my dearest Tampa Bay Devil Rays, having come so far in the post-season, may yet fail at the last minute! Fie upon ye, you freaks from Fenway! I would see you writhe like a starving minnow rather than have you trash the Philadelphia Phillies in the World Series! As for the comedy duo of Joe Buck and Tim McCarver, I hope your bardly stylings result in the lowest-rated World Series EVER! If I know the New Yorkers whom my gloatee, Master Blackwolf, purports to serve, chances are they'll now have the NFL on ESPN on their brains! And well ye should, Surface-dwellers! I, for one, haven't heard that idiot mantra "Are you ready for some footballlllll!!!!!" in aeons!

The moral of this saga, Mortals, is this: You don't wanna have ol' King Neptune come looking for you when he's angry. I've been known to teach a few dum-dums a lesson or two, compliments of my trusty trident! Which is to say, no foolin' around tonight, my dear Devil Rays! I want you as World Series Champions --- and I WILL NOT have these dratted Bostonians forestall my will! So sweareth Neptunus Rex, King of all the Oceans!