Electric Pirates Entertainment: 23 Years and Still Your Favorite Swashbuckler!
EPE's mission, from the very beginning, has been: "...to seek out the weird, the wild, and the misunderstood in all facets of the entertainment community..." And undoubtedly, few individuals have best represented that Mission Statement than our Corporate Mascot and Principal Spokespirate himself, beloved and glorious Blackbeard. Having said that, I thought it might be a good idea if, on this, EPE's 23rd Birthday, our dangerously wonderful Captain Teach should say a few words to you about the wonders of being a Pirate in general, along with future post-Jack Sparrow adventures.........
Ahoy, ye landlubberly Mortals! Blackbeard the Pirate here. Now shut up an' pay attention:
Well, ye heard ol' Master Blackwolf --- that beanrake of a lad Richard Washington and I have sailed tergether these twenty-three accursed and dusty years. In that time, we've made of lot o' Pirate friends, and we've sailed many decent waters. From dearest Jamaica Rose Barton to them blarsted Crimson Pirates; and from our merry mateys, the Seattle Seafair Pirates to the Pyrate Guys, Cap'n Slappy, Mad Sally an' Ol' Chumbucket, we've made many friends across the Seven Seas an' beyond --- and been in on a good many Pirate movies --- especially our three most favorite such films .... the Pirates o' th' Caribbean Trilogy, o' course! Ha-har!
Now it be time ter be lookin to th' future. When we found out about HBO's recent documentary Roman Polanski: Wanted & Desired, we knew that here, in 2008, Mortal-reckonin', was the perfect chance ta remind ourselves, as we've done all these 23 years, why we put our little company together inna first place: One o' th' first things Richard told the world when EPE first set sail was this: "The swashbuckler of recent years has been put down so many times it's no longer funny." Now that we be the ones what be large an' in charge, who amongst dares ta laugh at us now, sez I? Aargh!
We've felt our oats a lot since July 1986. Will we get to feel our oats again at the dawn o' the second decade o' the 21st Century? I may not be a-knowin', but by Long John's peg-leg, I'd sure like ter be findin' out, eh what?
Well, enuf o' my bilge! Here's to Electric Pirates Entertainment and every last scurvy thing we've ever done! I just hope we'll still be around so's I can poke me trusty cutlass in yer face fer as long as ye be willin' ta put up wi' us ---- becuz him what sez otherwise gets to take a long walk off a short plank, c'peesh?
So, in closin', an' takin' a cue from the ol' Mage o' Talisker: Yo-ho-ho an' a bottle o' Coca-Cola Classic! Aargh!
CAP'N ED'ARD ("BLACKBEARD") TEACH
Corporate Mascot/Principal Spokespirate
Electric Pirates Entertainment, Inc./EPE Holdings, Inc.
New York City, USA